Tuesday, August 08, 2006
-Everyone knows that male cows don’t have udders.
-Everyone knows that cows have four stomachs, not seven and a half.
-Everyone knows that cows have no desire to stalk humans.
-Everyone knows that cows never wear hockey masks or masks that look like the ghoul from “Scream”.
-Everyone knows that cows can’t carry carving knives or machetes since they lack opposable thumbs.
-Everyone knows that cows have no overpowering thirst for human blood.
-Everyone knows that cows do not become ravenous for human flesh when they smell fear.
-Everyone knows that cows do not consider fresh human brains the ultimate delicacy.
-Mel Gibson (“Chicken Run”) forgot to mention the film when he was pulled over.
-The endless jokes about “Lady in the Water” were uncalled for.
