Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Top Ten Reasons Disturbia was #2 at the box office.
Yes, "Spider-Man 3" was destined to be #1, but the real surprise of this weekend was discovering that Disturbia, which has already been out for three weeks, only fell to the #2 spot, beating the other newcomer, Lucky You (which came in at #6). Here's why:
-There's no other movie like it. Except for Rear Window.
-Even straight men are attracted to Shia LeBeouf. He's dreamy.
-The title is an incredibly clever combination of "Distribution" and "Suburbia".
-When it was announced that the film won't be out on DVD until spring of 2010,
Shia's fans realized that they have to see it now.
-The film contains a hope-filled message about how teens
should always be believed no matter how outlandish their
claims are. After all, teens never have a reason to lie.
-The film contains a hope-filled message about how
creepy neighbors are always murderers.
-The film contains a hope-filled message about how brutal
murder in the suburbs is inevitable.
-The film supports the universal truth that voyeurism is fun and a great way to meet young, hot members of the
opposite sex.
-The film has a crowd-pleasing Marxist Communism outlook.
-It's the perfect film to watch while waiting for the Queen
to come visit your part of the United States.
Yes, "Spider-Man 3" was destined to be #1, but the real surprise of this weekend was discovering that Disturbia, which has already been out for three weeks, only fell to the #2 spot, beating the other newcomer, Lucky You (which came in at #6). Here's why:
-There's no other movie like it. Except for Rear Window.
-Even straight men are attracted to Shia LeBeouf. He's dreamy.-The title is an incredibly clever combination of "Distribution" and "Suburbia".
-When it was announced that the film won't be out on DVD until spring of 2010,
Shia's fans realized that they have to see it now.
-The film contains a hope-filled message about how teens
should always be believed no matter how outlandish their
claims are. After all, teens never have a reason to lie.
-The film contains a hope-filled message about how
creepy neighbors are always murderers.
-The film contains a hope-filled message about how brutal
murder in the suburbs is inevitable.
-The film supports the universal truth that voyeurism is fun and a great way to meet young, hot members of theopposite sex.
-The film has a crowd-pleasing Marxist Communism outlook.
-It's the perfect film to watch while waiting for the Queen
to come visit your part of the United States.
# posted by Test_Pilot @ 2:16 AM 
